Saturday, April 21, 2018

Music. It is Life.

Lyrics, song, music. They speak to my soul. They say what I can't say. They make my breath literally catch in my lungs. Some times they tighten the vise grip around my lungs and sometimes they loosen them.
I love so many artists. Picking a favorite artist is impossible. Even narrowing a list to five is difficult. I have what I call a favorite song, but there are so many songs I love. 
Favorite Artists/Groups: Lifehouse, Skillet, Brad Paisley, Nickleback (yes I can feel the judgement but I truly don't care), Red, TobyMac, Alexander Desplat (instrumental but some of the most beautiful music ever written in my opinion) Flyleaf, Fireflight, Icon for Hire, 3 Doors Down, Casting Crowns, U2, Matchbox Twenty, GnR, Kenny Chesney, and George Strait.
Fave songs: Or some. No way I can make a complete list. Well I could but....
New Moon, New Moon (The Meadow) and Full Moon Alexander Desplat. Those piano keys make me catch my breath every single time I hear them. 
You Should Know Where I'm Coming From Banks the lyrics say it all. Run. I'm dangerous. You will get hurt if you get to close so I'm warning you now. Get out. Lyrics and Music are fabulous.
Pieces by Red I swear I literally stop breathing when those first notes come through my speakers. My pieces shred my fingers. I feel like I take them to God, He takes them, and some how they end up back in my hands slicing me up again. I realize this is my fault. (It just started playing. Oh my STARS. strings again. Holy Crow I'm not even to the words)
The theme from Angel. Those strings and the way they use them are powerful. I'd watch the show and pick up the remote to skip the beginning credits, I never did. The music was just to beautiful. Buffy totally got gipped on that one.
My current favorite is Too Many to Mend by Libby Weaver
That is truly what I feel like. There have been so many pieces ripped off me and I don't see any way to put them back together to make a whole. I never feel whole. I think I'd like to. I wish I could remember if I ever did. I'm so friggin messed up. I know this isn't what God has planned for me. I'm in this ever loving vicious cycle of knowing He can make me whole (as Pieces tells me)
You call my name I come to you in pieces So you can make me whole
This is what I know God wants but unfortunately I feel more like Too Many to Mend
It's not safe here anymoreThere's too much damage to ignoreI've spun in circles, I'm confusedIf no one wins, does no one lose?
We never learned to bendSo we break and break againAnd now we're broken inToo many pieces to mendToo many pieces to mend 
When I first found this song, I heard it in the background of a show, the lyric that caught my ear was If no one wins, does no one lose? Kind of a nice concept. It'd be nice to not lose. 
Oh well. I did lose. I have lost. I'm in this mess spun in circles and so very confused. There are pieces of me scattered hither, thither, and yonder and I don't know if I can ever collect enough to mend. 
Maybe someday I will mend.


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